I love to travel and experience other cultures, don't get me wrong. But when Jon first suggested us coming to teach in Korea about two years ago, I was ...less than enthusiastic. I was not strongly opposed to the idea, but let's be honest, I was (read 'am') just a little (read 'really') panicked at the idea of standing in front of a class room full of eager students waiting for me to impart knowledge to them. Goodness, who am I to do that?? I did not major in education in college; props to people who did, you are top notch in my book. I had no plans of teaching. However, sometimes God has other plans.
So anyway, Jon and I finally decided that teaching in Korea made a lot of logical, practical sense. We didn't have any other concrete job opportunities lined up after grad school, and as I said, we love to travel and try out new cultures, and neither of us had spent much time in Eastern Asia. It was a pretty straightforward way to pay back a lot of our school loans while doing something service oriented at the same time. They would take really good care of us, and soon we would be on our way to the REAL mission field. This was our plan. But, it is quickly becoming apparent that God had a better idea.
Turns out, this is more than a job, more than a means to an end, more than a nice, profitable, service-oriented way to get to the "real" mission field. We have had worship every morning, and between those and my own thoughts (read 'God trying to get through to me through my slow brain'), I am starting to realize how much this year can do for me in a way I hadn't realized before.
I think it first started when we did our testimonies and as I was thinking about what to say, I thought about how this year I'm really really going to have to depend on and trust God more than ever to give me the skills and words and knowledge I need. I kind of coasted through high school and did decently in college, but as I said, I am not trained as a teacher. I have also never pushed myself to lead out in church in studious matters like teaching Sabbath School or leading Bible studies or preaching. And yet, here I find myself. In Korea, trying to teach 5 hours of English and 1 hour of religion everday, lead Sabbath Schools, preach, lead vespers and Bible studies for an entire year, with virtually no training or experience. How inadequate, unequipped, and scared am I? Very. This is what I mean when I say I will truly have to pray and trust that God will give me what I need for this year both as a teacher and as a missionary to these lovely Koreans, and if it is even halfway successful I will consider it a blessing and miracle from God.
I also am beginning to understand the deeper benefits that this year can bring for future jobs. This is so much more than a way to pay off loans. If I end up applying for an administrative leadership position in a human rights nongovernmental organization, I will feel so much better prepared after having been put in all the leadership positions that this year will entail. Hopefully future employers will feel the same way :) In a similar way, if /when we end up with a church organization like Adventist Frontier Missions (AFM), I will feel much more equipped and capable to reach people after having had so much practice here in Korea. This year will provide that experience that I need while still being surrounding by a bit of a support system from fellow teachers. That will hopefully help to prepare me for the time when someday we might be faced with similar tasks of trying to reach people, but basically are on our own.
Finally, I just wanted to share a couple of the worship thoughts that have really stood out to me. One of the first mornings, the Pastor's message was basically that we should never stop growing as a Christian and in our relationship with God. When someone asks us what our most meaningful experience was, it shouldn't be something from five or ten years ago. Rather, each new day brings new opportunities to have amazing and meaningful experiences and to grow.
Another message I liked was when one of our instructors, James, told us to look for the root of temptation. We all hear how temptation --> sin --> death. But what comes before temptation? Desire. And we think, why would we desire to sin and do bad? Where does that desire come from? James pointed out that in the Garden of Eden, the first desire to sin came from a lie from Satan, and basically that every temptation you have can be traced back to a lie you heard or picked up somewhere. ie, lies-->desire--> temptation-->sin-->death. So when you are tempted, you shouldn't just pray, "God please take this temptation away from me", but also pray "God, please help me understand the lie that lead to this desire and help me not to believe it".
There have been another inspiring worship thoughts and testimonies. Ruthie reminded me of my own thought process when she told us how she really wanted to be a missionary doctor and wanted to get into the mission field and just applied for this as a last resort kind of thing, but God kept closing doors for her to go to med school and she's now been here two years. She still hopes to go to med school and become a missionary doctor, but she soon realized as I am, that this is a mission field just as anywhere else is. Anyway, sorry this turned out as lengthy as it did, but I just thought I'd share. I'm pretty excited about how God seems to be fine-tuning and polishing me up for what seems to be a really exciting future! I can't wait to see what's next in His plans!
So anyway, Jon and I finally decided that teaching in Korea made a lot of logical, practical sense. We didn't have any other concrete job opportunities lined up after grad school, and as I said, we love to travel and try out new cultures, and neither of us had spent much time in Eastern Asia. It was a pretty straightforward way to pay back a lot of our school loans while doing something service oriented at the same time. They would take really good care of us, and soon we would be on our way to the REAL mission field. This was our plan. But, it is quickly becoming apparent that God had a better idea.
Turns out, this is more than a job, more than a means to an end, more than a nice, profitable, service-oriented way to get to the "real" mission field. We have had worship every morning, and between those and my own thoughts (read 'God trying to get through to me through my slow brain'), I am starting to realize how much this year can do for me in a way I hadn't realized before.
I think it first started when we did our testimonies and as I was thinking about what to say, I thought about how this year I'm really really going to have to depend on and trust God more than ever to give me the skills and words and knowledge I need. I kind of coasted through high school and did decently in college, but as I said, I am not trained as a teacher. I have also never pushed myself to lead out in church in studious matters like teaching Sabbath School or leading Bible studies or preaching. And yet, here I find myself. In Korea, trying to teach 5 hours of English and 1 hour of religion everday, lead Sabbath Schools, preach, lead vespers and Bible studies for an entire year, with virtually no training or experience. How inadequate, unequipped, and scared am I? Very. This is what I mean when I say I will truly have to pray and trust that God will give me what I need for this year both as a teacher and as a missionary to these lovely Koreans, and if it is even halfway successful I will consider it a blessing and miracle from God.
I also am beginning to understand the deeper benefits that this year can bring for future jobs. This is so much more than a way to pay off loans. If I end up applying for an administrative leadership position in a human rights nongovernmental organization, I will feel so much better prepared after having been put in all the leadership positions that this year will entail. Hopefully future employers will feel the same way :) In a similar way, if /when we end up with a church organization like Adventist Frontier Missions (AFM), I will feel much more equipped and capable to reach people after having had so much practice here in Korea. This year will provide that experience that I need while still being surrounding by a bit of a support system from fellow teachers. That will hopefully help to prepare me for the time when someday we might be faced with similar tasks of trying to reach people, but basically are on our own.
Finally, I just wanted to share a couple of the worship thoughts that have really stood out to me. One of the first mornings, the Pastor's message was basically that we should never stop growing as a Christian and in our relationship with God. When someone asks us what our most meaningful experience was, it shouldn't be something from five or ten years ago. Rather, each new day brings new opportunities to have amazing and meaningful experiences and to grow.
Another message I liked was when one of our instructors, James, told us to look for the root of temptation. We all hear how temptation --> sin --> death. But what comes before temptation? Desire. And we think, why would we desire to sin and do bad? Where does that desire come from? James pointed out that in the Garden of Eden, the first desire to sin came from a lie from Satan, and basically that every temptation you have can be traced back to a lie you heard or picked up somewhere. ie, lies-->desire--> temptation-->sin-->death. So when you are tempted, you shouldn't just pray, "God please take this temptation away from me", but also pray "God, please help me understand the lie that lead to this desire and help me not to believe it".
There have been another inspiring worship thoughts and testimonies. Ruthie reminded me of my own thought process when she told us how she really wanted to be a missionary doctor and wanted to get into the mission field and just applied for this as a last resort kind of thing, but God kept closing doors for her to go to med school and she's now been here two years. She still hopes to go to med school and become a missionary doctor, but she soon realized as I am, that this is a mission field just as anywhere else is. Anyway, sorry this turned out as lengthy as it did, but I just thought I'd share. I'm pretty excited about how God seems to be fine-tuning and polishing me up for what seems to be a really exciting future! I can't wait to see what's next in His plans!
No comments:
Post a Comment